How likely are you to leave a bad marriage if you have no education or poor career prospects? I realize there may be other factors such as children, years put into the marriage and each party’s willingness to work things out.

But let’s put that aside for the moment.

I have always always said that I wouldn’t want a lack of education or financial viability without my husband to stop me from leaving should things go sour.  While I value the sanctity of marriage, my sanity comes above all else and if it’s bad, I have to go.  God forbid I ever get to a point where I want out, I don’t want my future to be dependent on a random divorce settlement arbitrarily determined by a judge.

If you’ve been keeping up with me on Twitter, then you know I watched the movie This Christmas at least 3 times this weekend LOL  I had no idea it was that good!  But a few scenes caught my eye and I immediately thought of this post because this is a message I want to drive home to women.  Do not let your lack of career prospects or financial viability without your husband stop you from leaving a bad situation.  If this is the case then get in a position where you have options.  This also happens to be the central message of this blog, teaching women how to take charge of their finances so they are able to make decisions not bound by  financial limitations.

Please dont stay in a bad situation because you feel that you can’t make it on your own.

But I realize there are women who feel this way and I’d like to hear from you.  If you are or were in this situation, what drives your decision outside of love and children to stay?  We are having a discussion about this on Twitter so feel free to jump in:

How likely are you to leave a bad marriage if you have no education or poor career prospects? (Read from the bottom up)

	sundaycosmetics @gingerlatte@adonyaWong I have 0 tolerance for anyone who “assumes” I won’t make it. Oh NO The devil is a liar. Feel a sermon comin’ 13 minutes ago from web in reply to Gingerlatte
	sundaycosmetics @Gingerlatte @AdonyaWong That’s right! I learned to pray and STEP real quick. As an entrepreneur/person - I BLOCK the negativity 16 minutes ago from web in reply to Gingerlatte

AdonyaWong @gingerlatte I have friends who stay in unhealthy spots because they think they can’t do any better. Me? Scared or not, I wouldn’t stay. 25 minutes ago from TweetDeck in reply to Gingerlatte

	tjonsek @gingerlatte i think it does make a diff. espec if they haven’t had a job in awhile. could be terrifying. 32 minutes ago from TweetDeck in reply to Gingerlatte
	glennette @Gingerlatte Chances r slim 2 none, unless spouse is physical. 33 minutes ago from TweetDeck in reply to Gingerlatte

	tjonsek @gingerlatte yep. i remember at 1st before education & good job I was married & 2 scared 2 leave. thought i couldn’t take care of myself. 35 minutes ago from TweetDeck in reply to Gingerlatte
	AdonyaWong @Gingerlatte I’ll take the leap of faith for a thousand, Alex! Staying in a crappy marriage/relationship is not an option. 35 minutes ago from web in reply to Gingerlatte

Question?  What advice do you have for women in this predicament?

Check the video. Disclaimer: By the way I do not advocate violence or destruction of property. But it is rather funny! LOL This is for all the Jazmine Sullivans out there:

Popular Posts

• Tricia Walsh Smith: Reason #1 Why Women Should Marry Smart

By now you’ve seen all the different blogs discussing Tricia Walsh Smith’s revenge served cold online via Youtube. In the video she refers to her soon to be ex as “mean, bad husband” and then refers to herself as “poor vulnerable Tricia” waiting desperately for her husband to “do the right thing”.

Do The Right Thing? Let’s take a look at that.

Her Mistakes And My Issues With Her Plea for Help

1. She married a wealthy man without combing through her pre-nup to make sure that all of her needs were met to her satisfaction. Should her soon to be ex have a stroke, the pension kicks to his bank account (which his daughters control) but she didn’t fight detail while discussing the pre-nup? Where was she provided for in the event that he’s disabled?
2. She is complaining about being evicted from her apartment in exchange for 750k and then declares “I’ve had a horrible few years…” Excuse me? She is by no means poor or destitute, but thinks that the terms of their parting is so unfair. I don’t feel sorry for her because she should have paid a lawyer to make sure that she was going to be fine should they part. And, where is her lawyer? Why doesn’t he have a muzzle on this woman?
3. Publicly declaring, on YouTube, no less, “I’m an idiot, I’m an effin idiot“. I hate to say this because I believe in the empowerment of women, but get some grace and class woman, you’re not an idiot, just misguided in the signing of your prenuptial agreement and suffering the emotional distress of a divorce. I get that, but there is no reason to air your dirty laundry for all of the world to see. She’s a successful playwright with the ability to start her life over here in the States or back in London, just do it! Pick your head up and walk away from this situation with the grace of a woman and not the tears of a child. You can do it.

4. What part of her thinks so lowly of herself to accept a marriage in which no sex was to be had? She accepted this term of the marriage? Where was her duty to herself to demand that she have someone who loves her in all aspects, including sexually. In this day and age if smoke blows, there’s fire somewhere and he did a good job of blowing smoke up her @$$.
5. She defames her husband and family through this tape which for me is the final straw. I had some semblance of pity for her until she shows us pictures of each one and then in words that only a two year old uses states his stepdaughter is a “bad, bad person”. Yes, I am a counselor in training but I can’t help but ask mental breakdown much? Really, much of this could have been averted with some meds and a good lawyer.

   End. Snarky commentary

   My advice for Mrs Walsh-Smith

   Take Care of Yourself

   It’s probably best to start seeing a therapist, if nothing else for the purpose of having someone to confide in and make sure that you’re remaining psychologically and emotionally healthy as divorce can and will take its toll on you.

   Please don’t underestimate the toll this process can have on your mind and body, take care of yourself during this time. Lastly, check out my article The Smart Woman’s Guide For The Soon To Be Divorced, it may be a bit out of your league but may offer some helpful tips.

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   • Do I Stay or Go? One Woman’s Struggle To Step Out On Her Own (Video)
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