Can Money Buy Happiness?
In the 2010 flick Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, Shia LaBeouf’s character (Jake Moore) asks Josh Brolin (Bretton James), “What’s your number? …the amount of money you would need to just walk away from it and live?”
Without hesitation, Brolin responds, “More”.
Yes, that was a fictional movie but we all know people who have that same you-can’t-be too-rich-or-too-thin mentality. And let’s face it, who hasn’t played “What I would do if I won the lottery” in their minds? I have, several times in fact.
My visions – as cliché as they may seem – include luxurious vacations in exotic locales, a to-die-for wardrobe, and my very own ‘Team Susan’: a masseuse, chauffer, personal trainer, maid and chef. My parents would have the very best health care. My friends’ children’s college tuitions would be taken care of. The ASPCA would receive a big fat check. But would this accumulation of material goods (and snapshots of goodwill) make me happier? Is being rich overrated? Would I become more of a glass-is-half-full gal?
CAN MONEY BUY LIFE’S NON-TANGIBLES?
Money coach, best-selling author and award-winning financial journalist Jean Chatzky stated, “A Roper study conducted for my book The Ten Commandments of Financial Happiness revealed that what you need to feel happy is enough cash to live comfortably – not lavishly, just comfortably.” More money than that won’t buy happiness.” (November 2010 issue of Women’s Health magazine.)
Why not? Personal Finance Expert Andrea Travillian (takeasmartstep.com) explains that self-esteem can’t be bought. “If you don’t like yourself, you still won’t be happy regardless of how much is in your bank account. Money can buy new clothes and “toys” which provide you with a temporary boost, but eventually these items lose their impact. The gadget is no longer new, the car is old and you need to get more so you look for the next boost.
Bottom line: you can not buy self-esteem.”
Adds Matt Wallaert, a behavioral psychologist and lead scientist at GetRaised.com (a web service that helps people earn what’s fair), “It’s probably true that a big screen TV won’t automatically make you happy in any long-term sort of way. But if you hook up a Wii and start playing with your kids more often, that probably will. In other words, happiness isn’t about stuff: it’s about what you do with the stuff.”
In the same movie I referred to earlier, Michael Douglas tells his future son-n-law, “Money is not the prime asset of life. Time is.” Quite a turn around for a guy who coined the infamous phrase, “Greed is good”.
THE 3 P’S
Pop quiz – which of these brings us genuine inner peace and drive happiness?
- Purpose (Where do you want to serve? In what area do you want to make a contribution?)
- Passion (What are you truly passionate about? What is your ultimate dream?)
- Paycheck
Wallaert explains, “Part of happiness is a sense of purpose, a feeling that your life matter and that you are doing something meaningful with it. Philanthropy can certainly provide part of that sense of meaning. It is one of many things that one can do to feel like they matter. But so is building an empire, or teaching, or spending time with your family – people have many ways of providing meaning for their lives.”
We hear about people who have left high paying jobs to start nonprofits or pursue a long-awaited dream job – pay cut included – and are more fulfilled than they’ve ever been in their lives. People who chose ‘a’ and ‘b’.
BUT NO MATTER WHAT, WE STILL WANT IT…
If, in the end, riches do not make people happier, why do so many people go to such extremes to get their hands on the green stuff?
New York City bankruptcy attorney Daniel Gershburg, ESQ has a roster of clients who once “had it all” and then lost everything. “Everyone strives for it because they think it’s going to change their lives. They think they are going to wake up in a different world thanks to this financial cushion. Their expectations didn’t come to fruition and they feel empty. …disappointed that nothing has changed. They thought money would be the crutch to bail them out of their misery and are now left feeling like, ‘Now what do I do’?”
Adds Gershburg, “Surprisingly, my (formerly wealthy) clients who decided to claim bankruptcy are almost always relieved afterwards. There’s no need to maintain silly appearances anymore. That ‘hamster on a wheel’ feeling because is gone. They’ve been relieved of $3-$4,000 minimum monthly credit card payments and are completely fine with relinquishing the Mercedes and getting a Honda. It’s as if they have cut ties with an addiction.”
If you’re not happy without it, you won’t be happy – or any happier – with it.
So, back to my lottery fantasy. Yup, I had it all figured out – the trips, the clothes, the donations. And then I returned to reality, which to be honest, isn’t such a bad place to be.
