Are We Giving Up Too Much: After A Baby Full Time Or Part?
This is an old post but I thought I’d bring it back with some new information gleaned from the Washington Post’s article,After A Baby, Full Time Or Part?” “ This is something I struggle with being a newly wed with the expectation of children on the horizon. We are both just getting started in our careers so I struggle with having children and balancing my many interests while remaining 100% committed to their lives. Yes, I admit, I want to ‘have it all”.
My interest piqued in a new book written by author Leslie Bennetts: “The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much?” She speaks to many of the concerns I have as a young married woman approaching motherhood. This is such a sensitive debate, so I wonder why the author seems to be so divisive when addressing the issue. Speaking as someone who is childless I can’t imagine the sacrifices it takes to leave your career and choose to stay at home with baby through school years or even permanently. And, as such, I believe after reading many reviews and other mom blogs about the issue, this is what’s turned many women off from even picking up the book.
Still, I think she poses really important topics that any and every woman should think about when considering staying at home to be with their children.
- Have you calculated how much you’re retirement account will suffer?
- Do you have a plan for re-entering the workforce years later?
- How will you keep up skills & contacts?
- Have you calculated not only the lost income, but the lower pay you’ll most likely earn when you go back, vs. what you would have earned had you stayed in the work force w/out interruption?
- Do you have a written understanding with your husband about support in the event of the divorce? Does he acknowledge the financial risk you are taking?
This is where my quest for balance chimes in. Is it possible for us to balance motherhood and career at the same time and give each equal attention while maintaining our sanity? There are women who choose to work from home via flexible schedules and there are some who start home businesses or even go back to school while raising their children.
As I move forward in my life and career these are the questions that come to mind as we make the decision on when to have kids. I want to be there for them and to see each waking moment but at what cost down the line? Life happens right? I think most of the sources of information tend to be one-sided and I think its important to have information about the pros and cons of staying home or working or even both.
This is where the Washington Post’s article, After A Baby, Full Time Or Part?” chimes in as they also make some really good points for both mothers to be women post baby deciding on whether or not to re-enter the workforce. The article specifically hones in on how to negotiate for pay, benefits, and work out finances post-baby:
- Remember what you are worth, think about the things you want and need and ask for them. Start big and negotiate down if the company isn’t willing or able to meet your desires.
- Emphasize what you’re saving the company by going part time and taking a smaller salary
- If you can’t get full benefits, aim for proportional benefits. For instance, if you work an 80 percent schedule with 80% of your salary then you could get 80% of your benefits
- Look for alternatives and be creative. If your company can’t pay for your health insurance, offer to stay on the plan but pay the employer contribution-if that’s cheaper than paying for coverage on your own.
- Challenge employers who may be reluctant to allow a part time schedule. You may for instance offer to be available via email and or phone in exchange for leaving work at 3pm to greet your children coming home from school.
- Offer a trial period, people are more comfortable agreeing to something on a three-month time frame rather than a year. If gives you time to pilot and see if it will work. It usually does.
About the Author: Girls Just Wanna Have Funds is for the woman that wants to take charge of her personal finances. We value budgeting, investing, frugality and remain mindful of our spending habits. Move over and make way for women who are in control of their financial destinies and not afraid to say it. We're armed with a positive net worth and not afraid to flaunt it while breaking financial ceilings one stiletto at a time!
